Sometimes you just have to take a step back. I’ve mentioned before that I tend to these pages because it is cheaper than therapy. (wink) I was driving in to work suffering the blue-black darkness of a cold and windy morning (Ok, the sun was actually up but ”blue-black darkness” made for a dramatic scene. Am I right?) But this morning I was just not “feelin’ it.” Generally I’m an advocate of positive attitude but this morning my mind had been become recusant to letting go of a decidedly unhealthy funk. I was wallowing. I was holding on to the divisiveness of my “us versus them” obsessions. I was lamenting the last vestige of winters icy grip because it keeps me from pursuing my outdoor passions. And then there was that battle I have from time to time where I become mired in misplaced expectations. Sounds fun huh?
I’ve participated in enough pity parties to know that part of my problem was I needed to have a talk with God. That works for me. He doesn’t actually talk back but somehow I’m usually able to hear what He would say if He did. I had my talk and then felt the urge to turn on the radio. (See how that works) My car filled with the dramatic aria of Beethoven’s Symphony #9. As I became lost in the powerful chorus of “Ode to Joy” I realized that the cause of my angst was as simple as my focus had been misplaced. Not saying I’m shallow or anything but the revelation came to me as I was thinking about how much I enjoyed the powerful 16 speaker Bose sound system in my car. That chorus combined divergent voices to create heaven on earth. I recognized that the heated leather seats under me were a good placeholder until I could resume those outdoor passions I was longing for. And those expectations I wrestle with? They are mine. It’s kind of ridiculous to imagine things outside of my control have anything to do with aligning in a way that makes the world work the way I imagine it should.
Focus baby. It’s curious that I need to be reminded from time to time that I need to begin my day with gratitude. It’s such a powerful tool. Maybe why it works is simple to someone who understands brain chemistry but I’m just gonna leave that right there. And I’m grateful I don’t have to understand brain chemistry in order to turn my day around. I hope y’all started your day better than I did. If you didn’t, I hope it helps you to know you made this old man happy by just stopping by. You’re groovy and ya know it.
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